转眼又快一年了，

再过3天，又一个新的开始了。

希望一切顺心顺意，

希望一切如愿以偿。

加油吧！

sometime i might think people are greedy enough to ask for more...

by doing something that which hurting other and themselves...

trying the best way to communicate with people,

sometime i was thinking, why people always taking for granted..

is it a must to treat people in nice way?

whereby people never appreciated at all?

i am freaking tired to face this..

although i know that will be a best experience that i ever get...

i am freaking tired to think that..

although i know that i should and must done it...

and well...

i am just too nervous to handle it again...

*i hope i can spend this special day with you, seriously....

冬至快乐。。

这是回国后的第二个冬至。。。

比去年过的幸福，因为有妈亲手做的汤圆。。。

晚餐吃得很丰富，虽然不是同一个时间一起吃，

可是总会有团圆的意义，

因为我相信，只要有心，不管在哪，

家人的心，依然紧紧地跟我们系在一起。。。

对不起，最近因为工作太多，太忙，

忙到有点透不过气了，

没有多的时间陪你，

我知道你不开心，

除了对不起，还是对不起。。。

今天的一通电话，

把一切都说明了，

你的不安，我的忧虑，

今天已有了答案。

信息惹的祸，

不管我们如何反抗，

结果还是一样，

应不应该接受这一切？

回到过去~~~

我欣然接受一切的痛苦，

我欣然接受一切的误会，

是因为我相信，会有雨过天晴的一天。。。

但心，依然是痛的。。。

今天似乎很累人，

出了一些意想不到的状况，

虽然说是意料当中，可是真的太突然了，

我真的突然发现，原来我是多么的无助。。。

你问我怎么办，

我要面对时，你却说不好，

解决方式不多，但也不少，

可是偏偏就拿不定主意，

无能的我真的，很彷徨，

你问我的理智到哪去了，

我竟然回答不了。。。

对不起，事情发生时我总不在你身边，

对不起，每次都让你自己一个人面对。

我很想站出来，

可是偏偏你却不让，

你要自己面对，

你害怕他们会伤害我，

可是我不怕。。。

我宁可面对他们的是我，

起码你所受的伤害比我来得少。。。

我的心，也会好过些。。。

我想要告诉你，

我会跟你一起面对所有的事情，

请不要把我摔在一边。。。

因为酱，我会更痛。。。

xb's~~ black currant w aloe vera

mine~ Malt Milk Ice Blended

Our's~~Japanese Octopus

mine~ Barcelona Chicken Chop

and xb's~~ Marmite Chicken Chop

8th Dec...

5months.....

i was trying my very best to comfort myself...

to spend a day with xb...

and thanks to xb, you really brighten my day...

we will always go there...

movie day on Sunday...6th...

Twilight : New Moon...

Nice...Edward still that handsome...

Bella still that pretty...

but the ending of the story was like.....

ya, jus like what i facing now...

the promise dateline ended 2010 march...

now 2009 dec...

you had never seen wad i trying to do...

maybe you re right...

i shd not given out any promise...

and now everyday i was checking on my email,

seeking for better job...located at SG...

only GOD knows what am i doing...

no one knows...none!!!!! not even you know me...

i shdnt ask those stupid question in this evening

if only i know u not in the mood....

i shdnt reemphasized the promise

if only i know u won believe it....

and well, back to the point....

i still a LOOSER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and i think i really need to change my mind...

doing the things that i think i need to do for my own,

i will and i should be the one who stop everything in this world...

cos a LOOSER never deserved people's thrust and love...

bye people....

your words make me feel hurt,

make me feel like bleeding,

make me feel like i really a looser...

xb ask me during lunch time,

she said: dear, have you ever regret to come back to msia?

looser said: yup...

she said: but why still you come back?

looser said: i dunno...maybe i shd say i dunno how to face million tons of problem i facing by myself?

she said again: but dear, i tot u got lots of frens there?

looser answered: well, ya..but still they will have their life, their bf/gf, will have a family...and will leave me.....

she said: how bout if we go there tgt?but u must work hard now to learn more b4 u go back there...at least u will not only stuck at outlet mgr but can up to other level...

looser said: sure of cos....i wanted this lots...but i need time... )=

and now......

well, karen ling really a looser...

and hey people,

just come and attack her,

she kind of died dog now....

no way and strength even to fight back,

cos clear and simple....

LOOSER.........

大老远的从KL驾着车到PENANG去喝她的喜酒，

心情起伏很大，不是因为她，而是因为与我同行的朋友们，

他们的任性让我吃不消。

看见蕙兰幸福的笑容，我觉得很开心，她找到了他，

一个真正疼爱她的他。只希望他们都是幸福的。

这次的喜宴，让我有机会再见到我新加坡的朋友们，

很开心，但却很累。。因为路途遥远，我一个人驾着车，

还要承受着如果走错路，被鸟的压力。。。

我很想我的白。。。

真的很想。。。

累了，我不想再去面对了，

累了，也不想再去思考了，

身心疲累了，脑袋也迟钝了，

如果这世界上，人类可以好像乌龟一样，

有着一层厚厚的保护层，

那该多好？起码，自己是真的有能力保护自己，

不让别人有机会伤害到你。。。

也不会让自己伤害到自己。。。

人，永远就是矛盾的。。。

day by day passed...

problem comes 1 by 1...

never stop...

i always think that after handover the outlet everything will be fine

but dun think so now a day..

it seem like everything not in the original plan..

handing over the outlet, people who took over make a mess...

staff complaining, customer complaining...

i seem like hopeless on the new management team...

but what else i can do?

i can only give time...

2nd customer calling jimmy for compliant..

i feel like useless, nothing i can do...

all my regular customers asking me to go back..

what can i do?????

这两天学了不少事，

学会了怎样好好分析情绪，

学会了怎样好好控制情绪，

也学会了面对自己的错。。。

从以前脾气暴躁的我，

到现在可以对事情忍气吞声的我，

真的不容易。。。

被人用粗口疯狂的臭骂5分钟，

令我失去理智，令我做错了一个错误的反应，

也令我陷入纠纷。。。

教我该如何让自己好过？

放手让staff面对新的经理，

让我觉得自己的残忍，

当我插手时，被人认为我从中作梗，

左右为难。。。

一心以为已经把事情解决了，

可是看来却是另外一件事情的开始，

一心以为这样可以帮到别人，

可是看来却是害了身边的人，

为什么每次都是这样？

好心帮人，又却做了坏事。。。

也许我真的太天真，

也许我真的太笨，

我很累，不想再走下去了。。。

把我带走吧，也许这才是最好的办法。。。

# 4 个月了，

好开心，能够跟你一直的走下去，

我珍惜现在你给我的一切，

有你在的分分钟都妙不可言。。。#

今天的心情只有一个字能形容，

烦。。。超烦！！！！！！！！！！！！！

遇上了一场小意外，

被一个懵懵恰恰的人撞伤了左脚，

脚跺有点肿，膝盖有点黑青，

走起路来一拐一拐的，

有点帅。。。哈哈哈哈

因为跟铁拐李很像，

但就没有满脸胡须。。。

我没事，不用担心。。。

这场小意外，也许会给我一个从生的机会。。。

原来真相有时并不是想象中那么的难以接受，

有个窍门的，在知道真相前，把那所谓的真相想的更加的残酷，

到你真正去面对时，反而觉得它犹如皮毛。。。

thank you for all the wishes,

all the gifts...

and all the sms....

i had a wonderful day..

27th oct 2009...

a wonderful day for me...

spending a whole day out with xb..

although nowhere else to go,

but jus feel nice...

10月27日晚上10点27分，

你的一句话让我觉得很开心，很甜。。。

谢谢你陪了我一整天。 <333

it coming again...

still something never get out from my mind...

everytime when it comes near to me...

i got kinda of phobia bout it...

how can i get rid with these? and it won be happen again??

i had started a new life here and these the 2years i passing thru the day without u,

but why still u haunted me?

phobia cos i really scared it will happen again,

never had these feeling since last nite after a song...

i had been thinking too much maybe...

but i jus cant help..

i really scared and worried...

* everything in my mind now is not for me,

everything in my mind now is jus for u,

caring bout ur feeling, ur thinking, and everything,

i jus dun wan you to be hurt...

but it seem like never got to work out...

and you re hurt, sorry it was my bad*

another playboy thingy here for both of us...

and a pair of rabbit which i cant upload that photo, dunno why...

i totally in love with 'playboy' ^^

and and and...stupid cough and flu getting worse...

make me cant sleep for the whole night..

block nose..coughing...

aaarrrggghhh....

and dunno where this pervert came from...

calling me middle of the night 2am...non-stop giving me miss call..

and the number of miss call up to 20times...

night mare!!!!!!

gosh....help me!!!!!!!!

生病了，伤风感冒，咳嗽。。。很辛苦。。。

人在店，心在哪？

想不通一些事，

就想不通，沉默是一种罪？

人也变得语无论次了。。。

在电台听到了这首歌，突然觉得它很适合你，

这几天的我突然感到很幸福，很甜。。。

那幸福的感觉远远盖过了那恶梦。。。

你，愿意让它持续下去吗？

品冠-疼你的责任

每次你任性時說的一些話　你知道那有多傷人嗎
但我頂多只氣個三分鐘吧　最後依然體貼的送你回家
有時想如果我不是一直讓　你也許會懂得學著體諒
但是我完全無法硬著心腸　做得讓你有一點難過失望

總覺得有疼你的責任　要你是最快樂最單純的人
因為你讓我的心變得豐盛　原來不奢望的變成可能
總覺得有疼你的責任　讓你做最輕鬆最自然的人
我想不遮掩也是一種信任　愛的瞭解包容才算愛得完整

中秋节快乐！！

还以为今年的中秋节要自己在公司渡过，

还好妹妹和妹夫没有在家庆祝，

今晚的晚餐还好，

气氛还不错。。。

回国后的第一个中秋，感觉不赖。。。

今天的生意并不很理想，

不过也好，起码他们不会那么累。。。

希望你也有一个开心愉快的家庭晚宴。。。

Oh why you look so sad
The tears are in your eyes
Come on and come to me now
Don’t be ashamed to cry
Let me see you through
Cause I’ve seen the dark side too

When the night falls on you
You don't know what to do
Nothing you confess
Could make me love you less

I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you
I’ll stand by you

So if you're mad get mad
Don’t hold it all inside
Come on and talk to me now
Hey, what you got to hide
I get angry too
Well I’m a lot like you

When you're standing at the crossroads
And don't know which path to choose
Let me come along
Cause even if you're wrong

I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you
I’ll stand by you
Take me in into you darkest hour
And I’ll never desert you
I’ll stand by you

And when, when the night falls on you, baby
You feeling all alone
You won't be on your own

I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you
I’ll stand by you
Take me in into you darkest hour
And I’ll never desert you
I’ll stand by you

Oh I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you

第一年回到自己的地方过中秋，

感觉怪怪的，仿佛家人已经不再注重这节日了，

人回到了自己永远的避风港，但心却想着往外跑。。

人是不是就永远那么的矛盾？

失去的是才最好的？

我失去了一些永远都不可能再拥有的东西，

在那当儿，我也发现我从来没有在阴影中走出来。。。

那伤害也许对我来讲真的太大？

当真正的去面对时，竟然发现其实我并没有那么大的勇气。。。

昨晚妹妹帮我做了一个简单的心理辅导，

面对着她，我竟然丢下一向有的大姐风范，

抱着她痛哭。。。

到现在为止，心虽然轻松了许多，但人也累了。。

那一切的情况，历历在目。。。

慢慢的被挖掘出来，一次过的面对，原来真的很痛。。。

妹妹从来没发现到我的情况越来越严重，

因为我从来没有跟她用心的谈。。

因为我一直掩饰着自己。。

因为我一直为他寻找借口。。

也因为他真的老了。。。

曾经想过，狠狠的骂他一顿，

曾经想过，用力的拥抱着他，

曾经想过，大声地告诉他，我是真的很爱他。。。

可是这都是曾经。。。

我到现在为止，还找不到该有的勇气。。。

我现在学习着如何面对我心中的两把声音，

在学习着怎样面对我心里的那根刺。。。

我真的在学习着。。。

i learnt lots of thing todae...

most of these were psychology...

fren of mine and sis of mine helping me to came out from 'shit'...

until now then i now that since i was a little girl,

there lots of things never get resolve..

and it always in my heart, and is really bottom of my heart..

till recently, i found out that the cycle came back again to me...

i talk to Sharon, a counselor for me i can say...

she help me to find out the roof cause...

and i had never think this will happen...

the person who hurt me deep, was my dad...

surprisingly...i even cant believe it...

but it was so true when i cry non stop while i talking bout it...

it was in Sharon office...

when i was home jus now,

i told my sis about that,

she also trying to help me..

but anw, she make me cry more even worse...

till my eyes swollen....

luckly wking late tmr...

well, it seem like really works...

i now feeling better and really better....

&karen really tired...

finally let out all those shitty things...

silent all the while and cant be silent anymore...

i had a great night sleep finally,

nothing to think anymore..

release~~~

mama told me this morning,

papa dun agree if i go penang...

lots of worries from them and basically bout the salary,

and of cos i dun think so...they worries based on my health as well...

they wan me to be well taken care..

well....you know what shd you do?? (=

was trying all the while to settle everything...

and now i fully understand that i cant run away from facing the true..

and see now...i think i manage to do it..

and it seem feeling good...

and i really LOVE you sias....

Do not be too moral. You may cheat yourself out of much life so. Aim above morality. Be not simply good; be good for something

i found this in my FB, i realize that people who younger than me think better than me...

how many times of failure i faced, but still i continue the same mistake...

am i too nice to people, or am i just look like an idiot?

finding out the truth seriously hurts alots..

but what else i can do?

and now there are 4 options with me...

tell me how to make a decision...

most properly i will go for option 4, but before that, should i try other option?

and really i cant live without you,

do promise me not to leave me alone no matter what...

i am strong, but weak in certain area...

stay with me will you?

this what i realise...

my heart really stollen by you...

and seriously...

what else i can do??

hey well, people i am back...
feel great and nice spending these few days with Rachel and TW...
off-ing my handphone, without any disturb..but..still issue over there...

1st time driving alone to Genting...
feeling different from the previous time..
this is the 2nd time i had spend days with rachel at Genting..
totally different....

She gave me a big hug when she saw me,
of cos tw cant hug me...hmmm...
having great fun...movie at the 1st night,
Tsunami...nice...touch...
walking around Genting, going into Casino...
Arcade..Starbuck...

Theme park, the next day...
taking flying coaster as for the starting of the rides...
TW feel like shit...haha...well, cant deny...is scary..
and i had tried the ride that i never think that i will try..
i cant recall the ride name, but is sort like jumping down from 10th floor...
the moment it came down, i had no time at all to think..
cant even speak a word..
the weather wasnt that good..
raining...cold...could it be nice if u there with me?

came down from Genting on the Saturday...
spending some time at my working place,
besides having a meal,
i need to settle someting urgent..
and of cos i kena nag..
but well...i cant just leave it like that really...
we going to Aloha,
had a great night..
Rachel and TW was drunk i think...
but still we enjoy the night...

Sunday...
Sunway Lagoon...
this round together with xiao bai..
lots of funny things happen..
all locked into my memories,
but i dunno hw am i going to blog it out..
hahaha...old people..

and today.....
i feel like shit...
really feel like shit...
i dunno how to explain it..
but jus shit..

xb，你要好好照顾自己，
别让我心痛。。。

jus dun feel liike letting you go..
my heart was break into pieces again..
a little hug, meant a lots for me..
and what i had told you before u went off,
is really meant it..and just for you..
no matter in or out of relationship,


you still have me...
and i always loves you

i am going off for 4days...
enjoying these 4days with my dear rachel and tw...
i dun wish to bring all those shit tgt with me...
i jus wan a peaceful rest...

保佑我~~

我真的希望你们比我更好过，

最起码，我问心无愧。。。

左右为难的我，

不想你们难受，但我却无能为力。。。

感觉很难过。。。

看到你们脸上的笑容，慢慢的消失在我眼中，

我的心很痛~

我希望~~

我真的希望，你们能够给大家一点的时间，

就一点。。。

拜托。。。

突然发现最近有一首歌一直在我脑海中盘旋着，

突然发现原来旧的歌其实比流行歌曲来的更有意义，

突然发现自己原来已经很累了，

突然发现原来。。。

我的心真的真的受伤了。。。

以前我看到朋友哭，我很羡慕
可是我怎么逗我自己，怎么弄我自己
我的眼泪都流不出

总觉得能够哭的朋友都很幸福，
能够把满腔的无奈，满腔的痛苦
让泪水带走

最苦是泪水哽在心头流不出，
就想要爱却不懂怎么去爱，
自己哭过后才明白，
流过泪的眼睛，把世界看得更清楚

只有真正懂得付出的人，
才懂得何谓哭，为何哭，
再坚强的心偶尔也会脆弱，
心会痛，心也会感动，
只有曾经真心付出的人，
才懂得何谓哭，为何哭，
泪水要记得为真心保留，
眼泪别白白的流。

一波未平，一波又起。。。
这一切几时才会远远的离我而去？

身边的人，
你们何时才要把真相告诉我？
请不要在让我继续的猜，
我实在撑不下去了。。。

我的精力已经用尽了，
而且远远的超出我的极限。

突然发现，原来的我已经不是原来的我。。。
我再也找不到回来的路了。。。

迷路的感觉原来可以那么的可怕，
我不想再挣扎，但舍不得放弃。。。
很迷惘，很矛盾。。。

感谢一路上有你的陪伴，
对不起，让你担心了。。。
给我一些时间，
我知道我可以熬过去的。。。
请你不要放弃我。。。

七月初七，七夕
是牛郎和織女相见的日子。

今天的我终于可以安安静静的休息。
把公司的电话关机，和xb在外逛一整天，
感觉真好。。。

看了一场电影，
吃了一顿丰富的午餐和晚餐，
好好地享受了一天的时间，
原来这样的感觉真的很好。。

catching the movie name Orphan..
not bad...can go for it...

大头贴，
很久没有拍了。。。
今天拍了一集，和佩杏跟小白。。。
哈哈。。。好笑咯！！哈哈。。。

希望还会有机会。。。

就一个字，

累

i never think that this will happen in the real world,
or maybe should i say i am so naive??

i trusted you lots,
u gain all my trust..
and aslo other ppl around you,
but you did this to us??

i dunno if u can face ur family...
i dunno if u can face all ur frens...

i had did watever i need to do,
i had done my part...

but seriously still i not believe it...

turn up urself..
explain everything...
maybe u still get a chance...

yupp...xb re right..
should not believe people 100 percent,
he/she might betry you anytime..

终于病了，

我的胃抗议了，

发烧，胃痛。。。

觉得很悲哀，

别人生病，可以好好的休息，

我生病，还得回店赶报告。。。

电话响个不停，

烦~~

如果在那一瞬间，

死神把我带走，

那我该感谢它，还是埋怨它呢？

从来没有让自己这样累~

工作的压力越来越重...

人在subang, 心在 Equine...

这种心情谁能真正的了解？

你说的对，我没有死党那么固执，

可是你错了，我并没有你所说的怀疑，

要知道，她一向讲话都是这样，

也许只是个误会。。。

切记，

只要问心无愧，

一切都不成问题了。

i trying to hide..

hide something that i really cant take it..

i dun wish to see it by myself,

cos i cant bare it..

but,

i must face it as soon as possible...

dun you once again break your promise..

dun you once again break the trust between u and me...

cos u know wad will i do...

这几天都很累，精神都很差，

很多事情都集中不了精神去处理，

工作的压力慢慢的增加，我需要更多的体力去应付，

但感觉总是有心无力。

今天，从早上到下午，

一直都在车子里，

从EquinePark, 到Subang, 再去Mutiara,接着去Bukit Tinggi 和Meru，

耗了我很多的精神，一面认路线，一面听Khairul讲解我以后的工作性质，

很累。。。

我知道接下来的日子，我们要见面的时间会变得越来越少，

但我不会因为这样而放弃。

原谅我这几天的任性。。。

一切的疑问都已清除，

该坦白的始终还是得坦白，

心，现在舒服了吗？

原来知道事情的真相，真的会让人透不过气。

我还在猜测，还在犹豫， 我应该怎样做。

有没有人可以帮我？

朋友的定义是什么？

what a suck day...

tot everything is fine and smooth...

but at the end of my shift there SHIT again...

can that stupid guy stop giving me problem ??

i was too kind to him izit??

he came far away jus for money...

i knew it cos i had been like him b4...

but kind to him izit mean tat i treat myself damn cruel???

i had stop thinking bout xb and joan de issue..

but as for kay...

i still dunno wad to do...

i know she still care bout ur frenship...

but she chosse silent when facing me...

either me...

i really tired....

i need a break!!!!!!!!!!

finally let out..
finally get the true..
and finally things goes fine...

and and and finally i knw the answer...
the answer really comfort me...
and it really did it...

and rachel,
thanks......

我在说服自己别放在心上
我在尝试。。。

左右为难的那首歌，
在我脑海中荡漾着。。。

别叫我放手，
因为我不会轻易放手，
除非。。。
对方先放弃。。。

-----------------------------------------------------------

左手寫他　右手寫著愛
緊握的雙手　模糊的悲哀
我的決定　會有怎樣的傷害
面對著愛人跟朋友　哪一個我該放開
一邊是友情　一邊是愛情　左右的不是　為難了自己
是為你想吧　該為她想吧　愛雖然已不可自拔
裝作不在意的你　如何面對

原来他所提及的笨蛋指的是xb，

原来一开始他就看上xb，

原来我的直觉是对的。

原来一切一切的真相，

是那么的残忍。

我宁可什么都不懂，

也许我会更好过。。。

原来脑袋的转动可以令人那么的痛苦，

原来休息的信念可以那么的强，

如果我的脑袋可以随着我休息的时刻，停止转动，

那该多好！

但看来似乎有些特定的难度，

因为不管我休息的信念多么的强，

我脑袋的转动度并没有因它而慢下或停止。

我很累，真的很累。。。

我要好好地休息。。。。。。

烦恼，请你暂时离我而去，让我好好地休息，

拜托你。。。

Station 1 Equine Park,

the outlet name of mine...

this outlet run by 4 important ppl...

outlet mgr, chef, floor supervisor and bar supervisor...

and we re pround to say that...

Equine Park, never had an single issue in our operation...

all 3 of the deprtment was great in team work...

not even bosses say so...

those singer who came to our outlet for performance,

they agreed too...

it was a great motivation for me and my sfaffs...

but....

management are planning to form a support team...

and my big bro chef being selected...

i should be happy, but i will be sad...

perhaps i can really get thru...

well now left with me....

i will be battle alone again...

but well, i still have my best team with me all the time!!!

will u be with me?

i should had blog these last night,

but when i reached home was another day...

well, doesnt matter...

i realise that Station 1 was a nice place for me...

a nice place for me to meet back some old friends...

even my primary school teachers, and principal...

what a wonderful feeling...

and i really like it...

i miss xb...what a suck sunday... )=

went for moive todae with xb..

Harry Porter...

mayb cos of the mising part for the last 2 episods...

i seem like bit blur...

anyway, i still enjoy it very much..

having breakfast at Old Town before movie start...

tot wanna have a short shopping after movie...but not enough time

well, i need to get a pair of sport shoes...

too bad...dun get to buy it...

i having a great time todae...

but... tired...cos mens... )=

i was in a terribble mood todae..

sort feeling like idiot...

i cant even handle a Nepalish...

wth...

he was supposed out from the outlet and to another outlet of cos

but jus a call to stop these all happen from real..

khairul said he cant be transfer out

reason?? my outlet had paid all his levy and other fee...

and cos of this stupid reason i need to bare with this prevert??????

kay's problem let me headache as well

i wanted to help but seem likes never work out..

well, let it be...

staff started to apply leave...

another problem coming soon..

wish me luck... >.<

8th july,

a special day of mine...

hope it can be memorize every year...<3

i had no time all the way till todae...

finally can write something here...

it was a tiring day...

wking time make me feel like hell...

was wking 6pm to 3am yesterday,yet home at 5am

after calling xb, slp at 530am...

and guess wad...waking myself by using own alarm, and morning call from xb...

still almost late for wk...

of cos larh, wking 12pm todae leh...

slp only few hours...

and it come again...

need daddy's help again...

but is damn pain...

especially my back and arm...

like wanna send me to hell...

virus leaving tmr...

he was a great asst of mine,

although just manage to wk tgt for 1.5months

but we knw each other well..

hope that he can really make it for what he want...

and holly shit...

suddenly 1 shot i down of 3 staffs...

and my shift will become bloody hell again..

and of cos daddy and mummy will nag...

and also Rachel and Jocelyn too..

i thik xb also... >.<

well,

i need to get prepared...

to face another challange..

Khairul- my AM...

he came down todae...

to download us some information...

perhaps i won forget to brief them...

if not...

god bless me...

oh well, people..

i think i shd borrow tw's words...

a Rojak entry for todae...

hope you won mind...

and i started to miss you...

will you feel it??

11th July...

Happy Birthday Mr.See Tong Wai!!!~~~~

damn fast, another year..

i still rmb last year we went karaoke tgt..

sorry for not celebreating with u...

anyway..do enjoy!!!!

something that not suppose to happen

finally come..

my heart like fucking pain..

speechless...

if it can stop beating, it will helps..

i had been wondering wth is going on with u..

i cant get to see the old you at all..

her leaving really that make you hurt?

and i tot u had knw how it feel...

told u since it start..

it won be any good ending there...

but u insist..and i let u be..

and now..see...wth is going on...

everyone is talking bout u..

how many times more i ned to cover you?

u re now creating prob...

and i become the one who clearing all this shit for u?

izit fair enough for me?

you never put on my shoes to think i bet...

try and stand in my position...

and tell me what shd i do?

现在的心情很凌乱，

非一般的乱。。。

有谁会在我身边支持我？

i wasnt in a good mood...

kee tong left us...it was so sudden...

he was 1 of my trainer in McDonalds...

super good guy...teach me lots...

friendly, cheerful, helpful...

he thought me lots...

and even we had some small talk and smoke after class...

he was there to help me when i get bully by AE...

i tot i can work with him some other time in BK...

i received the news said that he was brain dead, and lying in hospital last week...

and today, karine told me he had leave us..

i was force to accept this...

kee tong, we love you...

you re the candles for us in McDonalds family...

forever and ever, u will in our heart...

my heart was terrible pain...

i miss PY so much, but i cant get to talk to PY..

i was online everynight after work...

but...ya, this is wad i get...

pain pain and pain.....

the feeling was back...

mid of the year always make my 'feeling' sick...

i missed you, missed you lots...

jus like seeing you every corner...

checking up my phone,

and i realise that i really got noone to talk to...

song that you love was playing..

it bring me back to those days we were together...

open up the memory of us..

you are so clear there with me...

i wanna a cry...

a bad cry... i wanted to let it out..

and really let out...

i was holding my handphone for the whole night few days back..

i was so helpless, and moody..

i check on my phonebook, kinda of 讽刺, cos i din ever saw a number that i can call..

it was 1.30am in the middle of the night..

and at the point of time, i feel that i really got no one there..

what a pity me...

i was alomost drunk..

although doc say i cant take beer..

i confuse whether am i happy or sad..

got happy got sad...

happy cos i can get along with the staffs here..

(althought everywhere i go, staffs are close to me )

sad? i dunno how to express it out..

but anyway...it will be fine..

and i really tired...

wad a tiring weeks..

but yup..i still have sometimes to get online..

check on the time i blogging..

this kind of timing, ppl around me had slep soundly..

i jus back from work..

ya...seriously..

well...i jus dun wan the blog rotten

and i am here to write a little bit things..

nothing much bout me to update..

getting close with my staffs now..

but they had piss off by my so call 'supervisor'..

well..i am trying to do something on it..

and i realise..i getting tired..

i feel great when looking at hooi lan de ROM photo..

finally this lady get a guy that who really love her..

and now, they really get togather...

i will send you my best wishes... (=

i can understand how you feel,

and tat's y i told u to ignore the msg..

feeling betray...

i always get these feeling..

but yupp..it won minus any hurt feeling 

doesnt matter that you find out urself,

or i telling u the truth...

maybe u re right..

time..time might be help...

times....

today was the 12th day of my working day..

ya, non-stop...and guess wad...

i working nite shift all the time..

from 2pm -3am...

my normal working shift in 6pm to 3am..

but seen i am new..i take time to do my closing..

and i finish it always 4am..

having fun with the kids when working..

seriously is reminding me while working with you all..

and seriously i miss life in SG..

my area mgr told me,

they are plaining to extend their busniess to SG..

and wait and see..i will be the 1st to go...

*but dunno whether am i still welcome to be back??*

well, life still going on...

still with my medication...

mama getting better...

baba still strong..but look old...

the 2 little kiddo getting naughty...

sisters still pretty...

life always moves on...

and i still missing you...

i need to let out...

just feeling heart pain..

nobody can help me..

and i knw it all cos by my own..

i won blame for other..

only blame for own..

blame myself for breaking promise..

blame myself for being so busy body..

blame myself for letting this friendship broken into pcs..

ya..if i did nothing, it won be happen...

and i am so dumb...

i know your decision..

well...thank you (=

and SORRY...

*i hope that you will understand 1day..

i never regret to have you in my life,

do take good care and i know you will..*

All The Love In The World- The Corrs

Im not looking for someone to talk to
Ive got my friends, Im more than ok
Ive got more than a girl could wish for
I live my dreams but its not all they say
Still I believe
Im missing something real

I need someone who really sees me

Chorus:

Dont wanna wake up alone anymore
Still believing you'll walk through my door
All I need is to know its for sure
Then I'll give all the love in the world

I've often wondered if loves an illusion
Just to get you through the loneliest days
I cant criticize it - I have no hesitation
My imagination just stole me away
Still I believe Im missing something real
I need someone who really sees me

Chorus

Loves for a lifetime not for a moment
So how could I throw it away
Yeah I'm only human
And nights grow colder
With no-one to love me that way
Yeah I need someone who really sees me
And I wont wake up alone anymore
Still believing youll walk through my door
Youll reach for me and I'll know its for sure
Then I'll give all the love in the world(dont wanna wake up alone)...

yupp..damn tired...

todae is the 1st day my outlet open for business..

and officially my new chapter was open..

life back to similiar with McD...

but the only different was..i no longer there...

yup..staffs here all youngster...

make me feel young of cos...

they like to play around...

jus like you... (=

i was all the while there..

reading all ur mood and feeling..

but i cant figure out...

and found that i had lost...

maybe what i had done was wrong..

but these wasnt what i want..

i care bout you, and of cos i care bout ppl surround you..

cos i never ever want to see you sad..

and now i knew it...

I WAS WRONG...and there was no way to reverse back...

nothing was replied no matter what i do..

i told myself not to let go..

and i won...cos i know...

i love you...and i really do...

doent matter if the world had changed...

i will still there..standing at the same point..

jus to wait...

and jus for you...

i off for this whole week..

thinking my blog also same as me..

well, spending the whole week at home..

wake up 630am and go jogging with mummy...

monday stay at home...

tuesday return uniform and shopping at The Curve...

wednesday see mr.hew and stay at sister's shop...

thursday stay at home...

friday follow daddy and mummy to Klang...

saturday out with wenyng, to Sungai Wang Plaza,

and also Pavilion..dinner at Pepper Lunch..

and Salmon pepper rice was choosen by me..

taste )=

with cheese, but no cheese taste...

and todae sunday...

start work!!!!!

back to new outlet around 12pm,

start cleaning....till 7pm jus now..

den nothing to do le...

the project manager ask me go back, 

cos nothing need to be done le..

hahha...will in tmr 10am...

wish me good luck...

Happy Mother's Day...

yupp...second day off relaxing at home..
but is sort like going out here and there..
but most of the time with dady mummy
and also my 2 little nephews...

yupp...hahahah...happy happy but tired tired.. >.<

thank you kathy for helping me to change the blog skin
and also the song...

hahah...
ur ah jie me, damn nasty rite??
hehehe

Artist: Natalie

Song: Love You So

Lyrics :

Ooh Ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh

From the minute that you got my attention

I was taken and I have to mention

I was trying to not let it show But I knew I wasn't gonna let you go

From the way that you came right to me

Looking all hot with the style that threw me

No one would've ever known it

You would be the one who take this heart and hold it

You got that extraordinary way

Got to be next to ya every single day

You do something that I just can't explain

Wanna take the chance and tell you you're the one for me

Ooh, I love you so

Just look in my eyes, they'll tell you where this could go

Yeah

Do you know it

Ooh, I love you so

Look in these eyes, they'll tell you where this could go

I just want you to know

You can san say anything you want to

No stress 'cause I understand you

We got a vibe you can't define

Want everyone know that boy is mine

We won't fight and stop and stare at the way you hold me

You take me there at times I feel I lose control

Forget everyone but the hand I'm holding

You got that extraordinary way

Got to be next to ya every single day

You do something that I just can't explain

Wanna take the chance and tell you you're the one for me

Ooh, I love you so

Just look in my eyes, they'll tell you where this could go

Yeah

Can you feel it

Ooh, I love you so

Look in these eyes, they'll tell you where this could go

I just want you to know

Please know this I'll always be right here

And you don't have to look

Nowhere else babe

Don't think for a minute

This love will change

Oh you should know that

Ooh, I love you so

Just look in my eyes, they'll tell you where this could go

Yeah

Can you feel it

Ooh, I love you so

Look in these eyes, they'll tell you where this could go

I just want you to know

Ooh, I love you so

Just look in my eyes, they'll tell you where this could go

Yeah

Can you feel it

Ooh, I love you so

Look in these eyes, they'll tell you where this could go

I just want you to know

wee...happy happy...
finally i can go...
and without seeing those ppls anymore...

but yay,
i will miss my staffs...
todae the last day in JayaOne,
i like superstar...
keep photo-ing...
shd post up photo when i freeee~~~

tmr,
last day and really the last day in Fireman...
and i will at The Curve...
seeing my daddy and mummy...
and some staffs...
and this chapter close...

17th May,
the brand new chapter will be open again...
wait and see...

and i miss you all...
>.<

i am asking for early release from current company...

perhaps it approve and my last wking day will be this friday...

new company had call me and ask if i can start wk early..

i given them the date of 16th...

cos seriously i need a break...

anyway, they agreed...

well, for other, i might be lucky enough to get a job so soon..

and yupp...this wad i think also...

and i hope everything will be smooth...

i had talk to Andrea yesterday..

a good talk...we learning from each other...

but yeah...we really get to learn lots of thing from others..

it depend re u willing to do so...

if u can notice,

every single talk, chit chatting, 

for sure u will get to learn something...

see how u 'take' it...

and i realise that he was a scared loose guy..

and he really a loser...

hey, loser...

wait and see...i will be back...

but not for revenge...jus be patient...

i looking at my may schedule...

and yes...i only work till 15th..

what a good news...

i dunno whether is my problem or what..

it seem like everywhere i work 

having the similiar problem..

sometimes i really lost..

really cant find the way out..

i like keep repeating the thing..

repeat, repeat and repeat...

arghhhhh...when will it stop?

i want

a bad cry

to it let out!!!!!!!!!!!

i am damn ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hate and i jus hate...
really hate these kind of arangement..
i mean what the hell he is doing ?
purposely huh ?
i knew it u will scold me cos of the ordering,
but hey, dun forget what u had told me...u will taking charge back all these..
and what now?
well, good..15 days to go..
and i need no to see ur damn fxxxing face...
i really wana give u a slap on ur face..
AARRRGGGHHH...............

Lingling's set - RM36.90 consists of steamed rice, miso soup, mushroom tempura, salad, unagi and Japanese fried chicken.
And this is my set - RM39.90 consists of mee soba, chawanmushi, miso soup, salad, vege tempura and 5 pcs of sushi. But sushi came after 20min which i almost finish those food >.<
Lingling...she is one of my darling...see, her little baby finger.. heehee
look at those green colour bottle..simple and nice...
Senjyu is the shop name...
Salmon Fish skin..crispy, but sort like 'potato chips' in fish taste >.<

and finally my sushi came...

Ikea bedroom deco...

is in a small space, but damn organize..and the best is i like the design...

and also this, the bed is up and there sofa set down for study and also relax..nice huh?

The Uninvited...

well, not bad at all..story line bit complicated..

buy yupp, we still get the story at the end..

there are fews shots really scared us..

and seriously i miss movie with you..

especially horror and thriller...

and i think this is the 1st time i close my eyes

during the show...

before the movie,

we went for our lunch..

wondering shd we eat Sake Sushi, or others..

and finally we went into Senjyu, a Japanese Restaurant

in Cineleisure Damansara, the place next to McDonalds..

as like what ling said,

good place, good food, good price as well..

but wondering why no dessert in the set that we order >.<

and lucky they dun have, if nt i will need to keep

my weight in those really hell way...

1st time after all i spending my off day like this..

thanks darling...hahah...

The Uninvited..
i had been choosing The Uninvited and Friday The 13th..
but hmm...ya, we will take TU..
will be watching with lingling..
this is the 1st movie after so long back from March'09

and hey people, i am off tmr..
and having fun...i perhaps...

Have a great day!! ^^

Have you ever - Brandy

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever have you ever
Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything to make them understand
Have you ever had someone steal your heart away
You'd give anything up to make them feel the same
Have you ever searched for words to get you in their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start
Have you ever loved somebody so much
It's makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever
Have you ever found the one
You've dreamed of all your life
You'd do just about anything to look into their eyes
Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to
Only to find that one won't give their heart to you
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for that day when they will care
Have you ever loved somebody so much It's makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever
What do I gotta do to get you in my arms baby
What do I gotta say to get to your heart
To make you understand how
I need you next to me
Gotta get you in my world
'Cuz baby I can't sleep
Have you ever loved somebody so much
It's makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever

i jus hate these kind of people..
oh well, time will gonna pass as soon as i think, perhaps...

i miss my rabbit, and now plus a carebearzzz..

the day you went away - M2M

enjoy, people....

this when mummy birthday, see what my lil nephew trying to do?

he is so excited... (=

i will be off for coming 2days from fireman,
but working in willpower...
the sis of mine damn poor..
no one can help to take care of the shop..
anw, i still have 2days AL to go...
jus clear it barh...
but next month salary no extra le )=

reading back those old post,
for mine and also others...
time really passing so so sooooo fast...
haix..i old liao... >.<

i was watching Youtube jus now..
and i saw PY's prom night video clips...
well, i never deny that i miss PY..
and yay...and you too...

hoping that everything is smooth for you...
no and nothing to be worry...
pls add on more water into ur body,
minus most of the sugar,
intake more vitamins,
and adjust ur body clock...
yay, u knw i am nagging bout u again...
hahaha...yes, is you!!!

she look still strong although she 93years old...
a weeks back i still saw her kind smile,
and today she had left...
she not really related with me,
but she is my bro in law's grandma...
and now.. i facing the computer in my sis shop..
she asking for my help to take care of the shop,
well, although not a hard job, but bit boring..

human..changing in every single second...
now sitting down with heart beating...
the next moment maybe gone..
who will know what will going to happen on the next second..

really got to spend some times with family,
with friends, and urself...

曾经阅读过一份报导，

报导中提及过，

多抽时间陪伴家中的老者，和小孩。。。

因为老者仅剩的时间并不多，而小孩的成长过程往往过的很快。。。

不要错过与他们渡过的美丽时刻。

因为那会成为你一生中最幸福的回忆。。。

hmm...another bad day i think..
ealry morning received a summon again..
wtf sia...park into yellow box also kena,
park road side also kena...
eh, i stay there leh...shit larh...
and when i on my way out from JayaOne,
the aunty drive like wad sia...
she block my way yet she starring at me and scolding in her car..
hey aunty...cant u see u in my way now? u re blocking...
and move now!!

on the way to Curve,
i try to cool myself down,
and hmm..a good try..
ya, i really cool down...
listening to the radio..
peace....

well, Curve staffs all know bout my leaving..
ya, hey guys...i will be back as often as i can...
and i will try to...

something that forget to blog for the past few days..

saturday nite had a great gathering with agnes, yinfun,
yinfoong, eunice, meiyee, chong and stanely...
dinner at Bumbu Bali...
well, enviroment is nice, but service and food... >.<
when i reach there, almost everyone of them had finish their meal..
i was late and cos i am wking and only off at 7pm..
they started the dinner at 7pm..

looking at the menu,
damn heavy..i mean all rice, with chicken..
beef...bla bla bla..
i choose a meal of dolly fish..
and the drink..lime, lemon mix..and i asking for no sugar..
guess wad..is very very sour >.<
1st bite of the fish, wakao...SALTY!!!!!!!!!!
reject and replacement was nice..but had spoil my mood..

PapaRich coffee shop after the meal..
chit chatting around, most of the time i was a listener..
oh well, listener always my job among them..
hahah..

and back to today..
jus get to see hock chun in my restaurtant..
he came with his frens, and i wondering one of the girl, his GF..
but narh, i din ask either..jus guess..hahah
i had been long time din see this guy ever since graduate from Sec sch..

feeling of meeting back old friend doent bad..
a little bit of like close fren, yet feel like a stranger too..
hahah...

Life is all about waking up each day,
to discover something new,

About meeting old people.
but making new conversations,

Walking through old roads,
but till feeling nice bout it,

Realizing that you have grown a day older,
but still feeling young at heart,

Meeting busy schedules,
but still finding time for old friends,

Being nostalgic about gone days,
but looking forward to better days...

as for me, i am missing those old days when being with you...
i dunno what i shd do to cheer you up again,
i dunno how to make sure there no more empty promise,
well, another failure in my life...

there lots of memory in my K618i..
especially text message..
reading thru once again every single msg in the phone,
and it will be delete soon in the next minute..
cos no way for me to keep those msg,
stupid sony ericsson...

and i cant deny, everytime i saw ur msg,
it really make me smile...feel warm and love...
and i had been long time never received anymore...
sorry...

i knew and i understand how does it feel..

DISAPPOINTMENT, yes...

and i know i had let you down for thousand times..
promises being broken once and once again and seem non-stop..

when u're gone and the day you went away will always be with me..

I'M SORRY

there no news at all from SG..and i cant jus stop here..
i must keep going on..till the day come..
till the day come....